Youth, courting, and Rumspringa
Rumspringa (German/Deitsch, "running or jumping around") is the period of adolescence that begins the time of serious courtship, and, during which, church rules may be relaxed. As in non-Amish families, it is understood that there will likely be a certain amount of misbehavior, but it is neither encouraged nor overlooked. At the end of this period, Amish young adults are baptized into the church, and usually marry a spouse, with marriage only being permitted among church members.
The age for courting begins at sixteen (in some communities, the girl could be as young as fourteen). The most common event for boy-girl association is the bi-weekly Sunday evening sing, however the youth use sewing-bees, frolics, and weddings for other opportunities. The sing is often at the same house or barn as the Sunday morning service. Teens may arrive from several close-by districts, thus providing socialization on a wider scale than from a single church.
On the day of the sing, and after the chores are over, the young man dresses in his for-gut clothes, makes his appearance neat, and ensures his buggy and horse are clean. A sister, or sister's friend may ride with him, but usually not his girlfriend. At the sing, boys are on one side of a long table, the girls on the other side. Each person is able to announce their choice of a hymn, and only the faster ones are chosen. Conversation takes place between songs. The formal end of the sing is about ten o'clock, after which there is a great deal of talking, joking, and visiting. The boys who don't have a girlfriend, may pair up with a Maidel (girl). Following this, the boy takes the girl home in his open topped courting buggy.
Marrying a first-cousin isn't allowed among the Amish, and second-cousin relationships are frowned upon, though they may occur. Marriage to a "Swartz" cousin (first cousin once removed) is not permitted in
The onset of courtship is usually not openly discussed within the family or among friends. Excessive teasing by siblings or friends at the wrong time is considered invasive. Respecting privacy, or at least pretending not to know, is a prevailing mode of behavior, even among parents.
